Wednesday, October 3, 2007

"I think I just might eat that last Cherry Mash" and other mumbo jumbo

There is one more Cherry Mash on the candy dish. If I take it, I break the unspoken Chamorro rule of leaving the last "anything" for someone else to indulge in. I am determined to reason my way out of the guilt that will undoubtedly surface itself within minutes of Cherry Mash consumption; the guilt, which stems from 12 years of Catholic schooling, female image media propaganda and cultural taboo.

Why don't I just throw treats out instead of placing them on a dish for my staff to enjoy? I know why. I am a good and kind person who loves to see others smile. I love to smile. Smiling is good for the soul. What's good for the soul is good for the body. Cherry Mash will make me smile. I think I might just eat that last Cherry Mash. It's good for my body after all.

So, mom buys me and Yvette a two-month membership to Curves and it isn't even our birthday, or Christmas...or Philippine Independence Day...or one of the four "C" days . It's not a Columbus Day present or is it? Maybe it's Mother-Daughters Day somewhere in the world. Shut up! This isn't a gift plumb-ass, it's a hint!
Tami says that blogging is like leaving your diary on the bed for everyone to read. Why would anyone do that?

Dear Diary,

I wish I had a brand new purse. My heart's desire is to own my very own Coach Leather Legacy Satchel. Oh, how fine that would be, how I would jump with joy and lavish my appreciation upon anyone who was so inclined to buy me that.

My back really hurts. I think it might be from standing at the sink washing so many dishes after a hard day's work. If only Hope would offer to wash them for me. Of course, she's got other tweenage things to do that are more fun than washing some dumb dishes for her old mom. Besides, I would never dream of taking her away from iCarly, especially since they are brand new episodes she's never seen and all.



Things we can no longer do now that Peyton can read:
1. Shorten bedtime stories by omitting or summarizing the plot.
2. Spell out words when speaking like, "I bought some i-c-e c-r-e-a-m for later when the kids go to sleep"
3. Pretend the candy we are eating is really medicine. "This says Cherry Medicine and it tastes so yucky"
4. Make plans to go out without the kids. "You said d-a-t-e! You're not going to the gas station!"
5. Talk about the kids in front of them. "What! Sommer has a fever?, Sommer you're sick!"


Galvin Deleon Guerrero said...

OMG. iCarly is like totally awesome. How can you think of taking Hope away from such enlightening, thought-provoking television? After all, the premise of the show is that tween girls can broadcast themselves at anytime, anywhere.

Dateline's "To Catch a Predator" is gonna have a field day with all the copy-cat webcasts.


Boni said...

Speaking of thought provoking television, why is it that all the adults in kid sitcoms are either bumbling idiots or constipated finger waggers?

Hope can't even get out of her blog page without permission, which makes her crabby and grumpy. Sometimes being a mom is not so easy or magical.

hello insomnia said...

Of course the adults are bumbling idiots. It's not entertaining to watch a capable parent. It is hilarious to watch Homer Simpson say, "Come on Marge, it's a uter-us, not a uter-you."

bigsoxfan said...

Sweet, I forgotten adapting to my younger siblings as they began to read. Thanks for the reminder, it will come in handy one day.
Found out why the pumpkin has been not sleeping soundly. TWO (thanks A. Bennet) teeth coming in on the top row at once. I thought I had found a gold mine, when I lifted him up for a smile this morning and saw two gleaming white stubs. Funny the things which mean so much can be so very small.

Boni said...

Congratulations on the teeth pumpkin! Now you and Erdene will have to be careful with your digits!
Mona: Homer has raised the bar for all of us:)

Tamara said...

mmmm..that Cherry Mash looks good! Where can I get some?? Loved your journal entry too..Let me know if it works..he he

Boni said...

A very kind friend brought a bag from Kansas a few weeks ago. I've eaten two since then. They are yummy. I doubt any of my entries will work, but you never know!

Bruce A. Bateman said...

I have a taste preference for anything made with cherries. I have no idea why, it's just the way the old taste buds have always worked.

I'm coming by your office for a parent principal conference. I'm a parent and you are a principal, right?

Save one of those cherry whatchamacallits please. Sounds fantastic.

Boni said...

I think I'll make a home visit. Since I don't know where you guys live, I think I'll go to Porky's. Trade you a Cherry Mash (cherry goodness with bits of nut inside, chocolate on the outside) for a tart beverage (sore throat you know). My friend tells me that the original ones were huge and they had cherries in the middle, but this one is just as good and I found two more in my drawer!!