I've spent the majority of the day thinking about equity, fairness, justice and peace. I could probably spent all night consumed with these thoughts, but it would only be a waste of time and energy, both of which I have little to spare save for my wonderful family. It is a necessary lesson in life that evil will prevail. Not all the time, but it will, I know this all too well to try and dispute it. Evil, deceit, greed, they feed on victory, no matter how superficial, no matter how temporary. Truth lies motionless, unable to defend itself against the Goliath of malice. What's left to do but throw your hands up in the air and succumb to defeat? This was the question in my mind all day.
Then I took inventory of what was "lost" and "won" and found that what I wanted could never be decreed, wait, let me rephrase... What I treasured most in this world could first of all, never be taken from me, so there could never really be defeat. Evil prospers because it can. Evil prospers because it eats, breathes and sleeps conquest. Evil prospers because the only thing evil desires more is more. There comes a time when the chains of verbal abuse, mental hi-jacking and learned helplessness slip off your ankles and wrists and there's no power in heaven or on earth that can put them back on. When that time comes it feels like new rain, and the best place to be when it rains is the valley, because that's the place that gets filled up first.
I used to spend a lot of time thinking about why things were so bad and how people I thought I knew could be so venomous, so loathsome, and then I remembered what one person shared with me a long time ago. In the fable of the Scorpion and the Frog, it's best to remember what's in each of their natures. I'm thankful for that lesson, no matter how precarious the journey across the lake was, because it's taught me to neither hate nor fear the scorpion. It isn't much use to even pity the poor creature for it only sees what it has to in order to survive, it knows nothing less than what comes naturally.
At the end of the day, especially a long day like today, what matters most is hearing my husband's voice on the other line and knowing just by the sound of it that he's smiling because I'm on the other line. It's enough, to be assured that our home is filled with laughter, that our children are happy and that even though the lake still needs crossing, there's no treacherous ride, no scorpions to fear.